dang.............i've messed around and got old!!

yep,..............that's right,................i've messed around and got a year older!!

i'm really not sure how that has happened. most folks that knew me when i was just a young buck said that i wouldn't see 21 if i didn't slow down. then again..........that was 27 years ago.
i guess the cruelest part of growing older is the fact that i believed them. i never even thought that i would have a future, and i've never planed to have one either.
so here i sit today wallering in a pool of poorness, simply giggling at my life, because i'm way too proud to cry. then again,.........why would i want to cry?        i should be celebrating today!!   i should shout out my window of the world,........." today is my birthday!!"          " stuff that in yer pipe and smoke it!!"
hey,..............that sounds pretty good to me.   maybe i need to stuff my pipe with something, and smoke it!!           yeah,..............take a lil' trip, and never have to leave the farm!!
i really don't have any special plans for today. it will simply be just another day, except for the fact that i have something to blame my laziness on today.
i need to just admit my faults, and say it like it is, but i'm still hoping that it isn't true. i'm afeared that i've slipped in the cracks with those that are just too sorry to work!!     the thing is that i'm too proud to beg also, and that's one hell of a combination to have to live with.........ain't it?
well,..........i reckon that  will go on my list of things to worry about tomorrow. today i need to be seriously concentrating on a whole bunch of nothing. maybe i will clean my house today, ........and then again,.........maybe i wont!!
let's see,...............oh well,..............i have one dollar to my name.  you know,......... now a day's a dollar just ain't worth much. fortunate for me, i can buy one small box of cat food at the family dollar with that buck. the cat usually woofs down a box every three days. now that she is heavy laden with kittens she is eating even more.
birthdays were more special when i was a kid. i guess everything was more special back then. wait,.................hold on a second,...................i've got it!!.................i've really got it!!...................i know now what happened in my life to change everything. it's the Santa Claus syndrome.   ever since my mother broke down, and told me the truth about ol' Saint Nick..................my life has been on a downhill spiral!!       aha,.............i new if i kept seeking the missing answers to my life that i would finally find them!!  
damn,.............now,...... ain't that a friggin' relief?

i guess the funny thing is that today i don't feel any older than i did yesterday. i felt old as hell yesterday, and i still feel old as hell today!!               can i share something that really pisses me off with you?           it just grinds my gears into powder when i'm struggling to walk down the sidewalk, and some old geezer simply jogs right past me!!              it's like.............hello.............didn't anybody tell you that your too old to be doing that?
i guess the best thing about getting older is the great change that happens to men. you know,............when we swap heads that we think with.                it's a real relief to discover that your life does consist of more stuff than the sweet Lilly of a woman!!                   oh,.............yeah,..........i do think that i need to go now. i'm starting to wander off into forbidden territory.


                        ..............much love