I was filling her with some of my dirtiest dirt

Doing the right thing has never paid off in my life like it is now. Totally devoting my life to God, and putting all else on the back burner has made the difference. Getting to know God as my Creator it has to be the wildest thing that I have ever done. It has totally changed my perspective on every thing. I was a complete mess as a human being. I needed a change, and I have tried everything to straighten my life out. Of coarse I waiting until I had used up every option, before I tried the only one left. You have to remember I even tried to kill myself, and God simply laughed at me!! I know that I took enough to have done it if the power hand of been in my hands.

Everyday some thing just blows my mind, and they come from all different directions. I don't right about them everyday, and the reason is that I want to make sure that they are real. This is the first time in my life that I am really putting my Creator on the spot. There are promises in the Bible that He makes to us. However, before He makes a promise He says that we need to do something, before He will do His action. He even says in the Word to try Him, and see if He will not open the windows of heaven, and pour out a blessing so big that we can't contain it!!

I am doing nothing more that He requested that I do. If He say's to try Him,........ Then by golly I will try Him, and so far He has not been a disappointment in the least!!

Here lately I am being shown some folks at the mission that are acting out scenes from my past life. There is this one guy that just can't seem to keep anything together. He has completed the same program that I have, but with entirely different results. He has an old worn out car, that he can't keep running. He bought it after his other old worn out car was refused to do work on by his mechanic. Which he wore this man slap out of frame with complaining, and blaming him for his troubles.

This man has never met any one in his entire life that did not find an occasion to mess him over in some way or the other. At least if he did have somebody that didn't no one has ever heard of them. He is always going shopping, and the sales people must just see him coming. They must huddle up, and draw straws to see who gets the chance to sell him some thing that either don't work, or he really doesn't need it to begin with.        This guy is comical!!

The really strange thing is that he is always talking about Jesus in between his complaining. He goes to his church every time their doors are open. You would think that he is a Godly man when he is on a Jesus roll. That is quick ending when all the other madness floods out of his mouth. I feel sorry for him, because a person can't talk with him without being blamed for persecuting him.

He could be a stand in playing the role of my past life!! It really hurts to think about this, but that is the way that I was acting most of the time. I thought that I was ever being persecuted, because I was far to stupid to live like most human beings lived. That is not the way that I saw it though. I thought that I was almost perfect in every way. I had heard about a few folks that might have been smarter than I was, but I never did meet any.

I was exactly the same way about the things of God. I would cuss you out in a heart-beat, and the very next words out of my mouth would be, Jesus don't like ugly!! I didn't quite know the same Jesus that I have gotten to know today, and I am looking forward to get to know even better in my future.

I want to tell you one last thought today. I was at a Christian function more than ten years ago, where I was ask to give a testimony. I so nervously did. I even had it written down on paper. Because I was shaking too bad to hold the paper while I read off of it, a had to do what I could from memory.

After I finished there was this lady approached me, and started talking with me. She ask me several questions, and of coarse I was filling her with some of my dirtiest dirt.     Oh,.....I forgot to tell you that she was between 80-90 years old.     At least I thought that she was.    She waiting patiently for me to finish speaking, before she spoke.      When she did speak, she said the coolest thing that I had ever heard.

She said, “I used to be just like you!!”      I was in a state of total confusion after that remark. I entered into a stupefied panic mode of severe mumbling at this point.      Are you telling me that you were a crack head, a drunk, and a thief maam?       No, but I was a sinner in need of a savior.

Was that cool or what?

…........Much Love