I really wonder
sometimes what is the point of me being in the place that I am in? I
very well know why I was there in the beginning. Why am I still there
makes my scratch a few more hairs from my balding head. I am
surrounded by so much negativity that I chose not to take part in. It
seems like those others involved with the same as I am are really
getting the fire thrown to them. It can be almost depressing at times
watching what is going on.
I try to stay away
as much as I can possibly not be there. I can't tell you the last
meal that I ate that I didn’t have to buy, or get from McDuff.
Thank you Lord, that I get to re-up on a little groceries while I
give back tomorrow. The actual truth is that I am not suffering to
much. I feel for those that are suffering needlessly. I know what
they are going through, but I don't know why they would be in the shape
that they are in now.
It seems that they
put their trust in the wrong kind of people, about a lot of different
issues. That is really sad when you don't have anybody left that you
can trust. When you finally build up enough of a relationship that
you begin to feel that certain people can be trusted, and you do what
they recommend that you do a little at a time. Then suddenly when you
have done everything the way that they said to do, they change the
rules in their favor.
I don't believe
that Jesus is happy with a lot of things that have changed over the
past few months. It seems that a new agenda is taken precedence over
the teachings that were once in place. Money has become the new
agenda, and that is a seriously bad choice in anyone’s economy. It
seems to me that any program that was being run for the glory of God
would not suffer any needed finances. Unless.....
Now, it could be
possible if the vision has changed, and men are trying to make it
become something that is not in the will of the Lord. The Good Lord
usually does an excellent job in producing the finances need to cover
a project that He want to see materialize. Normally, when things go
awry in God's economy is when somebody, or a group of somebody's have
missed the mark in doing what God wants to do. The only other
possibility is when greed has taken over, and they are no longer
pursuing the will of God, but their own will.
Does that make any
sense to anybody other that myself? I will be more than happy to tell
you how this doesn't effect me in any way. I have learned to put my
trust in the Lord. I give Him my life, and everything that my life
consists. I accept everything that comes down the pipeline, heading
in my direction to be His will for my life today. I know that my day
will come when I will not be subjected to the events that transpire
under that roof. They are simply temporary. Everything is temporary
except God!!
I know that the
way that I see things now, and the way that I saw them in my past is
radically different. I like being radically different from most
people today. I love my life now, because it has meaning like it
never did before. I actually love myself today where in times past I
couldn't even say that I liked myself. I can honestly say that I love
people in general. Whereas before, I wasn't prejudice, I simply hated
all people the same.
See me believing
in a radical Jesus, has made me the radical believer that I am today.
I needed a radical change in my life, and I sure enough have got one
now. I have never been this happy in my life that I can recall. I
didn't say that everything was perfect, because it is so far from
perfect. Today I have the coping tools that I never had before. I
have love. I have hope. I have faith. I have a destiny. I have a
dream. I have Jesus, and that was all that I ever needed!!
….......Much
Love
No comments:
Post a Comment