Author Unknown

Do You Know Bubba?

Bubba was bragging to his boss one day.  "You know, I know everyone there is to know.  Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."

Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff.  "Ok, Bubba, how about Tom Cruise?"  "Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."

So Bubba and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door.  Sure enough, Tom Cruise shouts, "Bubba!  Great to see you!  You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"  Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still skeptical.  After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky.

"No, no, just name anyone else," Bubba says. "President Bush," his boss quickly retorts.  "Yes," Bubba says.  "I know him.  Let's fly out to Washington."  And off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Bubba, what a surprise.  I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and share a cup of coffee first and catch up."

Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.  After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who again implores him to name anyone else.

"The Pope," his boss replies.  "Sure!" says Bubba.  "I've known the Pope a long time."  So off they fly to Rome.  Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Bubba says, "This will never work.  I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people.  Tell you what.  I know all the guards, so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."  Bubba disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.  Sure enough, half an hour later, Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony.

By the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.  Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks him, "What happened?"  His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, "Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?"

- Author Unknown –

SAY WHAT?

After being interviewed by the school administration, the eager teaching prospect said:
"Let me see if I've got this right.  You want me to go into that room with all those kids, and fill their every waking moment with a love for learning?  I'm supposed to instill a sense of pride in their ethnicity, modify their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse and even censor their t-shirt messages and dress habits.  You want me to wage a war on drugs, check their backpacks for weapons of mass destruction, and raise their self-esteem?"
"You want me to teach them patriotism, good citizenship, sportsmanship, fair play, how to register to vote, how to balance a checkbook, and how to apply for a job?  I am to check their heads for lice, maintain a safe environment, recognize signs of anti-social behavior, offer advice, write letters of recommendation for student employment and scholarships, encourage respect for the cultural diversity of others, and oh, make sure that I give the girls in my class 50% of my attention?"
"My contract requires me to work on my own time after school, evenings and weekends grading papers.  Also, I must spend my summer vacation at my own expense working toward advance certification and a Masters Degree?  And on my own time, you want me to attend committee and faculty meetings, PTA meetings, and participate in staff development training?"
"I am to be a paragon of virtue, larger than life, such that my very presence will awe my students into being obedient and respectful of authority.  You want me to incorporate technology into the learning experience, monitor web sites, and relate personally with each student?  That includes deciding who might be potentially dangerous and/or liable to commit a crime in school.  I am to make sure all students pass the mandatory state exams, even those who don't come to school regularly or complete any of their assignments.  Plus, I am to make sure that all of the students with handicaps get an equal education regardless of the extent of their mental or physical handicap?"
"And I am to communicate regularly with the parents by letter, telephone, newsletter and report card.  All of this I am to do with just a piece of chalk, a computer, a few books, a bulletin board, a big smile AND on a starting salary that qualifies my family for food stamps!"
"You want me to do all of this and yet you expect me . . . NOT TO PRAY?!?!?

- Author Unknown –

Potty Talk

The story is told of a lady who was rather old-fashioned, always quite delicate and elegant, especially in her language.  She and her husband were planning a week's vacation in Florida, so she wrote to a particular campground asking for a reservation.

She wanted to make sure the campground was fully equipped, but didn't quite know how to ask about the toilet facilities.  She just couldn't bring herself to write the word "toilet" in her letter.  After much deliberation, she finally came up with the old-fashioned term BATHROOM COMMODE.  But when she wrote that down, she still thought she was being too forward.  So she started all over again and rewrote the entire letter referring to the bathroom commode merely as the BC.  "Does the campground have it's own BC?" is what she actually wrote.

Well, the campground owner wasn't old-fashioned at all, and when he got the letter, he just couldn't figure out what the woman was talking about.  That BC business really stumped him.

After worrying about it for awhile, he showed the letter to several campers, but they couldn't imagine what the lady meant either.  So the campground owner, finally coming to the conclusion that the lady must be asking about he local Baptist Church, sat down and wrote the following reply:

Dear Madam:  I regret very much the delay in answering your letter, but I now take pleasure in informing you that a BC is located nine miles north of the campground and is capable of seating 250 people at one time.  I admit it is quite a distance away, if you are in the habit of going regularly, but no doubt you will be pleased to know that a great number of people take their lunches along and make a day of it.  They usually arrive early and stay late.  It is such a beautiful facility and the acoustics are marvelous.  Even the normal delivery sounds can be heard.

The last time my wife and I went was six years ago, and it was so crowded we had to stand up the whole time we were there.  It may interest you to know that right now a supper is planned to raise money to buy more seats.  They are going to hold it in the basement of the BC.

I would like to say it pains me very much not to be able to go more regularly, but it surely is no lack of desire on my part.  As we grow old, it seems to be more of an effort, particularly in cold weather.

If you do decide to come down to our campground, perhaps I could go with you the first time you go, sit with you, and introduce you to all the other folks.

Remember, this is a friendly community.

Sincerely,
Campground Owner


- AUTHOR UNKNOWN -

The Joy…..

I went to see my Doctor today. I am at that age, where they simply make appointments, when there is nothing wrong.    Well,…..That is not exactly true, because I am also at the age now, where there is always something wrong. We just don’t talk about the wrongs, because I really don’t care for their solutions. Physical therapy is the medical cure all these days, and so far my physical therapy experience has made matters worse. 

Getting back to my story, which has nothing to do with anything, that I have said so far, except the fact, that I went to the Doctor today. It started raining while I was there, and so far it is still raining, three hours later. I rode my bicycle there, and I rode it home in the rain. I hadn’t got but a couple blocks from the office, when I broke out in song. I was singing praise to the Father, who was washing me clean with raindrops, and raising the water table in Florida.

I don’t sing well at all. My keeping the notes, in the same key while singing, is really out of whack!! I do better singing, while hiding behind, the louder voices around me, in the church. Today I was left in solo mode, and folks turned to look at me, as I rode past them. I didn’t care, because I was praising my Lord and Savior.     Was I losing my mind?     Was there something mentally wrong with me?    Maybe I shouldn’t have gone there, because my mentality is always suspect!!

I really think this falls under the category of the Joy of the Lord. Joy is the second named fruit of the Spirit, and it is right behind love. Galatians 5:22-23  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, 23  Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.

Just what is joy, and what ranks it at number two, as far as the Fruit of the Spirit is concerned?   Once again, I will go to the Webster’s Dictionary of 1828 to get a definition of the word joy. 

“Joy is a delight of the mind, from the consideration of the present or assured approaching possession of a good.”

In other words, the act of having joy is not conditional, on present situations. Joy comes upon us as Christians, at different times, and in different levels of strengths.  We cannot control the length, or the intensity, because we cannot control the Spirit.        Everybody still with me on this?     However, I do dare to say that it can be stirred up by study, meditation, or praise to the One, who is the Author, of the joy.

I guess by now you realize, that I simply don’t see the same things, at all times as “normal” folks. I really don’t think as Christians, or children of God, if we are doing the right thing will ever qualify, for the normal exemption on anything. We simply have too much that sets us apart, from the un-believing crowd, that we live among. I personally decided a couple years back that I would rather be happy, than ever try to fit into, that round hole syndrome again.

Ok.    Getting back to what rank joy in second place behind love is simple, if you will take the time to meditate on it. let’s compare a couple verses of scripture together, and let it roll around in our Spirits. First off, let’s take Galatians 5:22-23, and read what the fruit of the Spirit is, and then let’s introduce another scripture in the mix.

Hebrews 12:2  Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.

I believe that this might very well be the same idea, except worded differently. The first thing, which we will find in a comparative sense, is the fact, that Jesus is the first fruit, of the Spirit. (1^st John 4:16, God is love.) The second part is proof, that joy is not acquainted with circumstances at the time. I know that the cross was not the joy that was set before Jesus, for several different reasons. The fact that this verse says, that He endured the cross, is our first clue. This can be followed by the prayer that He prayed in the garden of Gethsemane, and the sweating of great drops of blood.

The joy that was set before Him was pleasing the Father in redeeming His lost children back to Him. If He had not of come to the earth, being borne of a virgin, and lived a sin free life, He would not have qualified for the cross. However, Jesus meets all the qualifications, to shed His blood, and give His life, for our sins. On the third day, He rose out of the tomb having conquered death and Hell.   Amen!!

I really wish that the readers would take a little bit of time to compare these two scriptures, which I gave to you. I know that they say different words, in each one of them, but given a little time, they will fit transparently over each other.      Ain’t God Awesome?

             ….Much Love       

The Saddest Verse..

I was listening to the radio a while ago. I don’t have a television, and I don’t have a television on purpose. The first reason, which I gave up on watching the television, was the fact, that cable got ridiculous, and I can’t stand all the advertisements.  However, the most important reason is because Holy Spirit has changed the way that I view things, and television is mostly foolishness. 

Let me go right ahead, and tick those religious readers, of this blog off really good. I would dare to say that somewhere up in the high ninety percent, of the television Evangelist are self-seeking, and really don’t care about God. They are nothing more than actors, doing what they consider nothing more than a job!! They live inside elaborate mansions, and have a garage full of cars, which most of us cannot ever afford to purchase.          Does the word Pharisee ring any bells?

I don’t need to get started, because these types irritate me as much as they did Jesus.  John 2:15-16  And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables; 16  And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father's house an house of merchandise.

James that is not the same thing!!     Yes, you are correct in saying that situation is not the same thing. Today’s situation has involved into something far worse. Back in the days, which Jesus busted up the crime ring inside the temple, there were several different folks who shared in the wealth. Today there isn’t but one heavy hitter controlling all the wealth. It is like a circus complete with religious popcorn and peanuts!!

I think this will fit right in with what my original plan was to speak about this post. Anyway, I really was listening to the radio. The newscast stated, that the drought stricken land in California, could be expecting to receive, a lot of much needed rain fall. Immediately, in my Spirit started praising the Lord for His goodness, and thanking Him for solving our problems.

Deep in my Spirit, these words came to life, as plain as I am writing them to you. “It shouldn’t be this way.”  I sat quietly meditating on these few words, and I quickly realized that the presence of sin, has robbed us of paradise. How many of us can grasp the concept, of how awesome our God really is?   Please,.. Let me to be the first to admit, that I am clueless to how awesome, that our God really is!!  How can a finite mind grasp an infinite concept?

Can I explain something, which is unexplainable?   Ok, you got me, because I can’t do it. However, back in the beginning Father created the first, and only, as far as I can tell, pipe-less irrigation system, to water the earth. I have put in several irrigation systems, and I find this to be more than mind boggling, and the word awesome is not big enough!!

Genesis 2:6  But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground.

Don’t you think, if our God could do all of this, that He could take care of our minor problems?   Do we really believe that God can do these things?   Does He really care? 

Luke 18:27  And he said, The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.

I give up James!!   If you have something to say, then just say it!!   What is God’s problem with helping us out, if He is really so able?  You might not would think that the good Lord would have any problem, with blessing His children. However, there is one that comes to mind. It is me, and you, and every other Bible believing Christian who, has ever accepted Jesus Christ shed blood, on the cross of Calvary, for our sin sacrifice.

Haven’t you ever noticed that the largest part, of the Bible, is directed at the Christian folks, and trying to keep them in line?  It is a sad fact, but very true, that we; the Christians, the church, the believers, the Saved, the Sanctified, the Justified, and the Forgiven, the Redeemed, and any other name that we can be call by are the reason, that this world is in, such a mess!! 

I can prove this point with one verse, which will be found, in the Old Testament of the Holy Bible. This is a verse straight from the heart of our Father. Some people say that the Old Testament is not meant for today’s time, and I am not sure how to comment, on that gesture. I truly hope that none of the readers of this blog is that naive. (All Scripture, 2^nd Timothy 3:16)

2Chronicles 7:14  If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

I don’t believe that this verse can get any plainly said. There are some that could go in more than one direction, but this isn’t like those verses. This is directly said, and so simply put, that a child, with any Bible knowledge at all, could put it all together. I believe that this is one, of the saddest verses, in the Word of God.    Ain’t God Awesome?

       ….Much love     

Teetering On The Edge

I just got to say to the readers, that this time of the year in Florida, gets me very excited!! The green clover is talking over, and the dandelions are starting to bloom. The weeds are poking out over, what little grass that was left. It is the first signs of spring, and I love it!! This might be premature excitement though, because the trees seem to be a little behind, in their budding process. Either way that we look at it; Jesus is still on the Throne, and His mercy endures forever!!    Amen.

I just had a move in my Spirit to write about something.   Do you ever get moves in your Spirit, which beckons you, to change your plan, or do something different?   Most of us have this experience, but not all of us do. Just because you are a member of a church, and fill a position, in that church. You might be the friendliest greeter at the door, every time a service is available. You could fill any position, or fill the pew, and not be a child of God. 

Romans 8:14  For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. 

Christians say things sometimes, which are inaccurate, and I do also. We tend to act like Father, and Jesus is right by our side to help us. I am not saying anything that conflicts with the Word of God. Father and Jesus are in Heaven.

John 14:2-3  In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. 3  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.

Holy Spirit is on the earth to help us, find our way to Jesus, and Jesus secures our way, back to Father. And that sounds like a pretty good plan to me. I wish that I had come up with it, but Father has the rights, and patent on that move!!

Jesus said that when He goes, back up to Heaven, that He will send another, in His place. I am going to post several verses on this, from the book of John.

John 14:16  And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever; 14:26  But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.  15:26  But when the Comforter is come, whom I will send unto you from the Father, even the Spirit of truth, which proceedeth from the Father, he shall testify of me: 16:7  Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient for you that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you.

I want to show you that even Jesus was led by Holy Spirit. Luke 4:1  And Jesus being full of the Holy Ghost returned from Jordan, and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness,                  Are you familiar with this story?               The Spirit was leading Him, into the wilderness to be tempted by Satan, after fasting for forty days. This proves as Christians that we will not always bed led into a thorn less rose garden. However, there will always be no mistake in His leading.

Now,.. Getting back, to those that are faking a move, in our local churches. If there is no move by Holy Spirit, then you are simply not a child of God, and your Salvation is based, on something other than Jesus Christ, and the work of the cross, which He shed His blood on, for the world. I know that these are really harsh words to some of you, and I honestly don’t want to offend anybody. That is not my purpose, nor my plan. However, I had rather rattle the teeth out of your mouth, than to see you split Hell wide open especially, when you are standing right there on the edge.

The Christian life is truly an exciting life to live. You can go through the motions, of living the Christian life, without ever surrendering you heart, and life to Jesus, as still receive benefits, of living that lifestyle. However, there will be certain, and very important benefits that you will never receive. The most important one is being a true child of the living God, and spending eternity with Jesus. We speak often about straddling the fence, but there is no fence in the mind, and heart of Jesus.

Revelation 3:16  So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.

There is no middle ground as far as Jesus is concerned. Father, Jesus, and Holy Spirit are the God of action!! They are continuously seeking out those who are lost to offer them Salvation at the expense of Jesus. the first, and most important move for us to make is to accept the sacrifice that Jesus made on our behalf, and them we can go onto the next step.    What is the next step? 

 Romans 8:29  For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.

There is an order to everything of God, and sometimes we decide to replace Him with ourselves, and skip the surrender part, and move right into to the part of being conformed to the image of Jesus. it never works that way, because if we skip the first part, then we are without power. That just leaves us teetering on the edge of eternity.     Ain’t God Awesome?

      ……Much Love