I Just Didn’t Get It…

I used to could not understand, how a Christian could be consistent, in their love for Jesus. I really wanted to act in this way. However, I was really far off, from achieving this wishful goal. I would see them going through tough times, and the biggest reaction would be an act of faith.           The Lord will provide a way!!      This used to irk, and baffle me to no end. I had to know this Jesus, that they knew, because my life was getting more miserable by the day, and they were staying steadily consistent.

  

Have you ever noticed, that the Lord knows exactly, what it will take to push you, over the edge?     In my last round of being homeless, a friend contacted me, and told me, that there was plenty of room for me, at his house. I thought that was a Godsend, and it was, but not in the way, that I had hoped. It had only taken me a few months to realize, that I was happier on the streets. This is a statement of pure misery, if you don’t know.

I am not saying that he was worse than I was, or the other way around. What I am saying is we had chemistry, that when mixed with alcohol would grow toxic. I knew that my alcohol consumption, and pot smoking was making me miserable. Deep down in my aching soul I knew that there was not but one working solution, and that was Jesus. 

The problem was that I had tried to live a Christian life many other times, and I always failed. I never doubted God. Somehow I realized that the problem was my fault. I wasn’t exactly sure how it was my fault. I simply knew that it was. I determined that this time would be different, and if it wasn’t it would be the last time, that I looked for a religious solution, in my life. 

Now we are getting somewhere, because it was the last time, which I looked for a religious solution for anything. That seems to have been the problem all along. I was trying to hammer a square peg of religion, into a round hole, that was meant for a perfect fitting spiritual life. This causes another problem though. How do I get a spiritual life?

I am not sure when these missing pieces of this puzzle came into play. I had totally thrown myself into the devotion of the C.R.M. program, and was setting myself up for a lifestyle change. I was choosing my associations, based on the Jesus that I could see inside of those around me. Mostly, I stayed alone, because I was learning to see things in people, that I never could see before. It was like a change was coming over me, but ever so slowly, that only by looking back can I see.

Matthew 7:7-8  Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: 8  For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

I can remember preachers preaching on this verse, before I hit my teen years. I always have been acquainted with these verses, but for some reason, I just didn’t get it. Today these verses scream volumes at me, about the true path, to obtain my truest need!!

Ask, seek, and knock are words of action, and the words receiveth, findeth, and shall be opened, are words that point, to our relationship. The relationship is the most important aspect, of our existence. We must remember the reason for our creation. I know that I keep saying this over, and over, and over again. The reason I do this is because, getting this will make all the difference, between living a victorious Christian life, and experiencing a miserable failure.

If we are living any kind of life, that doesn’t promote a relationship, with all three of the trinity members, then we are living a life in vein. I know that these might be harsh sounding words, because they actually are. They are among the hard saying that came from the lips of Jesus.

Matthew 6:33  But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

The only real thing, that is difficult about forming, a relationship with God is our own rebellion, towards the truth. We don’t want to be told what to do, how to act, and certainly not what to believe. We will be fine on our own, because nobody has the right to tell us what to do with our money. We are in the world and, of the world without, that life giving relationship.

1John 2:16  For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.

I don’t know why it took me so long to get this relationship aspect of my life. All that I really know is that I have got it now, and desperately want to share my experiences, with those who might still be in a struggle. I know that we are all struggling with some Spiritual essence of our lives, from time to time.          Have you ever considered, what it would be like, if we all had the same struggle, at the same time?    

That is why we have each other on this earth. We are to edify, and build each other up, in the hope, of our Lord Jesus Christ. We are to bear each other’s burdens, so to lighten the load of those who struggle, so that they can do the same for others.        Can you think of any other plan, for all the people of the world, than the one that God promotes?         Ain’t God, in the simplest form … just Awesome?

                   ….Much Love