It took a real effort for me to even start to smoke. If it had been
nothing more than the initial effects of simply choking to death.
I would have never continued. The truth of the matter was the
fact that it game me a buzz. I would find out later in life that a
buzz was something that I thought that I needed to maintain my way of
life, but that is another story.
It
start out really subtle for me also. A first was was a half a
cigarette every once in a while. Then was a whole one each day.
Before long the numbers increased, along with the frequency. After 33
years I was smoking a little less than two packs a day. I was
addicted.......Seriously addicted!!
Now
you must remember that I am telling you the only way that I found
that I could break this addiction of smoking in my life. I tried every way that was known to man, and this is the
only way that I ever found any relief from it. I am confident that
the same solution can be applied in your life in a different way. I
am simply tell you of the strength of the hold that it had over me,
and the solution that worked to break the chains that were holding me
in the bondage.
I
knew that if I was going to seek God in my life through this program
that I could not smoke. They would not allow a person to continue on,
and smoke at the same time. I had known this several months in
advance, and had been talking to the Lord about this before I ever
faced this problem. I was confident that God would work this out for
me if He wanted me to complete this program.
I
also knew from past efforts that if I was going to stop
smoking......I would have to stop completely. There was no playing
around with it. None of this, I will just smoke one after I eat kind
of business. It must be a cold turkey effort for it to work!! I also
knew that the same effort as losing weight had to be applied here. It
would take a total change of life style if it was going to work.
It
wasn't easy. As a matter of a fact it caused me more pain that any
other effort that I have ever put forth in my life has caused!! The
great fact involved was that I was not doing this by myself. By His
stripes I was healed!! I knew that Jesus had paid the price for
this heavy addiction on the Cross also!!
Even
knowing all this did not make stopping a piece of cake for me. I
still cried real tears of pain, because my body was aching to have
the stuff that 33 years earlier was causing it a different pain.
Yeah,.......That is how strong my addiction had grown. I was actually
crying real tears, because my body wanted something, but my desire to
have Jesus in my life was greater!! I knew that if Jesus couldn't
deliver me from this awful mess that I had got myself in that
everything that I had been taught about Him was a lie!! If everything
that I had been taught about Him was a lie then I was just wasting my
time being here to begin with!! I am not saying that God will not bless you if you smoke, and I am not saying that you will bust Hell wide open if you smoke. However,.....I am saying that God could not bless me like He wanted to if i were to contine smoking!!
See,.....I
was on a fact finding mission. I have to know who the real Jesus was,
and the power that He possess, if He had any to begin with!! I had to
know for myself, because what everybody else seemed to know was not
working for me any longer!! It wasn't that I was really putting Him
to the test, and then again,.......Maybe I was.
I
had grown sick and tired of hearing about an Almighty God, and His
son Jesus that I really didn't even know beyond hear say. I had ask
Jesus to come into my heart at the tender age of seven, and I believe
that He answered that prayer. I also believe that I wandered off, and
started living my life apart from Him. I also believe that I reaped
the benefits of my rewards from that action! I had honestly gotten
so far off track that I didn't know for sure whether or not that God
really existed. I had always thought that He did, but no longer knew
for sure. That is really sad!!
Now
I know for sure, and plan to live my life telling others of His real
existence!! As far as smoking went He had to free me from the bonds
that had me severely chained to the smoke. i have not smoked since May of 2011. It has been 18 months now, and there was no way that I
could have ever had that kind of power in myself. The substitution
that I made was reading my Word, and spending more time in prayer.
Remember it is about a life style change. Not a stopping smoking
change. As for me,.........It was a Jesus change!!
…..................Much Love
No comments:
Post a Comment